All the answers?

Last week I spent some time with a couple of people that continuously knew the answers to everything, and were very happy to tell me all about them. After a few minutes it became very frustrating, it seemed as if I didn't need to open my mouth to be given the answer. I vowed to ensure I don't become like that.

"The person who has all the answers understands none of the
problems." Unknown

Ask good questions, listen to the answers, try to understand and then see if you have any answers.

Listen to understand

One conversation I had last week made me reflect on understanding. It's not always easy to achieve, being quiet and trying are the beginning and sometimes are in themselves pleasing to the other person.

"I'm very hard to understand but extremely easy to please."

Nathan Gilkarov

So listen, try to understand and see how much pleasing you can do.

"You don't understand me"

As we approach Valentines day I was thinking about the way people sometimes act. It is easy in the busy lives we lead to run around trying to ensure that other people understand us and what we want. Is this missing the point?

"Do not worry if others do not understand you. Instead worry if you do not understand others." (Confucius, Chinese philosopher, 551-479 BC)

This is true whether talking about the special person in your life, or all the people you deal with. This month enjoy understanding others, see what a difference it makes,

Jon
12/2/07

Self belief

I, like you, could hardly have failed to notice that Valentines day is on the way. Like so many other things today it seems to have been overtaken by commercialism, but underneath it is something important.

An opportunity to remind somebody important in your life how important they are to you. But if they are to believe in you, firstly you must believe in yourself.

When people believe in themselves they have the first secret of success - Norman Vincent Peale

This week remember the good things that are you, remember where you are going and how good you can feel about that.

Jon
5/2/07

Be yourself

Have you ever wondered why so many people around you are trying to be somebody else, ever thought they'd be better off as themselves?
They, like you, are unique and incredible. This weeks' quote is from my favourite author, so I hope you enjoy it.

Today you are You, that is truer than true.

There is no one alive who is Youer than You - Dr Seuss

This week go out, be yourself, enjoy it and be proud of it.
Jon
29/1/07

Failure

Suddenly the month is flying by, it's nearly the end of January; our first workshop of the year went really well and I hope all is going well for you too.
One last thought before we move on from the new year and the new start that many people make at this time of the year.

Failure lies not in falling down. Failure
lies in not getting up." (traditional Chinese proverb)

So if you should ever fall, don't worry about it (and a great tip about this to follow soon). Have a great week,

Jon
24/1/07

Keep attempting

Whilst on a long drive at the weekend I was listening to the radio and learnt that last Sunday was the day people were most likely to break their new year resolutions.
This weeks quote is longer than normal, but stick with it and if you want help keeping that resolution going, call me or consider our coaching workshop on January 20th (a couple of places left if you act quickly)

"Everything you accomplish you must first attempt. So get busy making those attempts. Procrastination and excuses do not lead to achievement.The way to make it happen is to make the attempt.You may very well fall short on the first few attempts. There may very well be plenty of good reasons to give up. Even so, keep making the attempt. Action and persistence will get you everywhere. How do you get yourself to make the attempt? By connecting that attempt, and the achievement it will ultimately bring, with a real and meaningful purpose deep within you. When you are clear about why you must do what you must do, you'll have no trouble finding the will and the commitment to step boldly forward. Make the attempt, as often as necessary, and you will surely make it happen."

- Ralph Marston

Don't procrastinate, find the meaningful purpose deep within you, do keep attempting - you can get there.
17/1/07

Dare to fail

Welcome to the new year, and all the best for 2007. This is the time when many people have set new year resolutions and are starting to waver, perhaps you chose something you're now thinking was too brave?
So I have two thoughts for you this week, firstly consider our coaching workshop on January 20th and secondly this weeks quote. You were daring enough to start your resolution, I know you can see it through.
Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.- Robert F. Kennedy
12/1/07

Trying to please everybody

All ready for what seems to have become the season of eating and drinking? Are you looking forward to having lots of relatives to visit for the weekend? This time of year can often get tense, because we have loads of people round and try to please them all; so don't!!

I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is
trying to please everybody." Bill Cosby

Wishing you a wonderful Christmas

20/12/06

Success

We've often heard that success creates success, this week I have a good example of the opposite. I recently had a discussion with somebody who believed they had no successes and were achieving less and less as a result.

Success to them meant the complete and perfect execution of a very big project, that couldn't be achieved for months. We redefined success as the steps that needed to be taken to achieve the project; an important part of goal setting is breaking the goals into a regular achievable set of goals. The difference in performance, motivation and achievements have been incredible. This weeks quote came to mind while this discussion took place.

"Success consists of a series of little daily efforts" Mamie
McCulloch

Ensure you have the ability to reward yourself with regular success, and you will achieve more. Have a great week

Fear

How often do we build up a fear of something and then allow that fear to stop us from doing what we want the most?

It is not the mountain that we conquer, but ourselves. - Sir Edmund Hillary

Don't fear the mountain, look inside; you can do it. Have a great week,

Making a change

Sometimes we want to change things and we think we'll make several little steps; we tell ourselves we're afraid and end up not even taking the small steps as they don't get anywhere. When talking about this sort of issue with clients I often think about this weeks quote.

Don't be afraid to take a big step. You can't cross a chasm in two small jumps - David Lloyd George

So take that step, today! There are times when you have to just go for it! Have a great week,

Don't choose to feel inferior.

I had several discussions about how people feel this week, the common factor was people realising that implicitly it's easy to feel inferior, by choosing to! I don't know who coined this week's quote, but do think about it.

No one can make you feel inferior without your consent!

So make sure you're not putting yourself down and have a great week.

Don't talk about losing...

I had a great week and a great weekend, spent time with friends and honoured to help clients move a long way towards their goals. Then on Monday I played Badminton, which wasn't going so well. On making a comment about this to my partner I was given an pointed reminder.

I took the hint, we talked about winning rather than losing and guess what - we stopped losing. I can't promise you'll win everything, but I can guarantee you a good way to ensure you lose.

"The minute you start talking about what you will do if you lose, you have lost" - George Schultz
Put yourself in a winning position this week, whatever you're aiming for.

Make time, have fun

My last few weeks have been very busy and I've achieved loads, which is great; but as a good friend reminded me at the weekend make sure you have time to enjoy your journey. It reminded me immediately of my favourite author:

"It's fun to have fun, but you have to know how" - The Cat
in the Hat, well OK it was Dr Seuss really!

Just remember, make time today, and enjoy it. Have a great week,

Today time today

Always busy, always rushing around, always meaning to enjoy tomorrow a bit more - does that sound familiar to you?

"Today is for 24 hours only, never to be repeated so make
the most of today and enjoy the day you're on, it is the one you can truly live,
feel and experience right now"

Just remember to make time today, somehow, and enjoy it. Have a great week,

Wasting time on "hard" decisions

I spent some time with good friends at the end of last week and was reminded about how much energy and time we can waste dealing with "hard decisions". They appreciated this quote, and we went on to deal with the real issue, so I hope you do to.

There is no such thing as a hard decision – when we
think we have a hard decision to make it’s because we’ve already made the
decision and don’t want to deal with (or don’t know how to handle) the
consequences of that decision.

Have a great week and direct your energy at the important things.

To dare, or not to dare?

A short thought this week, but one that reminds us to keep getting out and striving to acheive the things that are important to us, even if sometimes they seem daunting.

"To dare is to lose one's footing temporarily. To not dare is to lose oneself" - Soren Kierkegaard

Have a great week and don't worry about a temporary loss of footing!

Risk taking

Last week whilst sitting watching the sun set beside the red sea, feeling the breeze across my face, tasting the salt in the air and listening to the waves gently breaking on the shore I was watching two boats; they reminded me of this weeks quote:

"A ship is always safer in the harbour, but they're designed to be out in the open sea".

Like the ship we're not meant to take the safe option all the time, we're meant to be braving the the open sea - whatever that might mean for each one of us; so don't even think about staying in the harbour, get out and take some risks - you'll feel better for it!!

Change

My son getting ready for the start of a new term, reminded me of that annual feeling of wonderment about the new school year, wondering each year what would be different.

The reason we send our children to school is to learn and develop; these are things that shouldn't stop after school age. Learning and development is change; we have to change, so why are so many of us afraid of it?

This week's quote:

"We cannot become what we need to be, remaining what we are." -Max Depree